a little bit of nothing

It's been a while since I wrote anything, yes? So why not a continuation of the Cracky!Adama Family? This fic is dedicated to unavitasegreta  and her awesome cracky BSG!Mary Poppins fic. This fic is also unbeta'd, so all mistakes are mine.

Title: The Camping Trip From Hell, Take Two
Author: Lily Winterwood
Rating: K
Fandom: BSG
Characters: Bill Adama, Laura Roslin, Lee Adama, Kara Thrace, and Billy Keikeya
Pairings: A/R
Summary: Total Future!Adama Family crack from the same universe of the Grand Canyon crackfic. Obviously Bill, Laura, Lee, Kara, and Billy didn’t learn anything from the Camping Trip From Hell (aka trip to Kobol), because they’re going camping. Again. On Earth.
Disclaimer: I don’t own BSG, and I sure as hell don’t own the Lake Cachuma Recreational Area. That place is hell when the winds pick up.

( the crackiness continues. )

Here are ten (general) fandom pet peeves of mine.

1. Vampires popping up in stories they should stay away from. Not just those sparkly guys from Twilight, but ALL types of vampires infiltrating ALL fandoms. Seriously? Was it necessary to make Laura fall in love with Edward frakking Cullen?
2. Mary Sues. Evilest of all evil character types. I hate it when a character can be pretty and smart and talented and OMGSPESHUL at the same time. I hate it when a character gets his/her way for no reason whatsoever. Especially when the whole story is just said character getting their way after way after way. There's no plot.
3. DOM/sub relationship dynamics in a fic using a pairing with an equal sharing of power. The characters are most likely Out of Character. I especially hate Wimp!Laura and Evil!Bill. Where in all of BSG did you see Laura being a sniveling weakling? That's Gaius Baltar's schtick, kay? So stop frakking with Laura and Bill's characters like that.
4. Smushed ship names. There are some that I can stand/like, but on the whole, NO NO NO. "Adamalin" sounds like a drug. "Rodama" sounds like a fantasy character. "Adoslin" sounds like Hitler gone wrong (or at least wronger than he already was). Nuff said? Nuff said.
5. "R/R PLZ NO FLAMEZ!!11!!!" Oh, shut up, Suethor. There has never been a goodfic writer who put this in their summary. It detracts from the actual summary and is basically a shout-out to the crowd: "I SERIOUSLY SUCK AT WRITING BUT IF YOU READ THIS SHIT DON'T YOU DARE CALL ME AN ASSHAT OR I WILL SIC MY INTERNET LAWYERS ON YOU!1!!!!"
6. Going with that train of thought - people who say they welcome constructive criticism but flip out at any criticism offered. Seriously? You just told us you want to make your story better but when we give you tips you consider that a blow to your already fragile ego? We're not trying to persecute you or anything; we're frakking trying to help.
7. Crazy ubershippers who basically declare that their ship is Teh Holy and all other ships can go to hell. Gaius F. Baltar, I don't frakking care. I know that Adama/Roslin is cute and Canon and stuff, but that's not grounds to denounce Roslin/Baltar.
8. Fics in the vein of "Celebrian", where the women are sexually degraded and molested and the guys all have freaking huge penises. Uh, no thank you. I'll go and read something that won't make me want to go after you and castrate you with my bare hands, kay?
9. Thanksgiving/Fourth of July in England/Middle-earth/Narnia/Galactica. Even IF I do live in the US and I have a sense of patriotism, I think this is utterly ridiculous and Canon-shattering. The US is not everywhere and there are people who don't celebrate those holidays. (le gasp!)
10. People taking one character and mushing it with another and calling the result an original character. Ever heard of Sonichu? No? Good. He's the brainchild of an autistic 25-year-old man-child who draws like he's in kindergarten and videotapes himself having sex with a blow-up doll and putting it on YouTube. Autism and all other disabilities do not waive asshattery. I've got flisters with bipolar disorder who write the best fics ever. Anyhow, back to the main peeve. Sonichu is a supposed Original Character and guess who the inspirations are? Sonic and Pikachu. Here, have a barf bag.

So there are some of my pet peeves. I know, I must be such an evil person who can't understand the meaning of free speech. Well, this is free speech, too.

i is wrting liek ths,, help me. argh. teh gramer, whar iz it?//11!/1?

[someone from the_ppcsics Grammer on Lily]

THANK YOU.

Anyways. The lack of grammar! It hurts our eyes, Precious! The corniness! AAAAAAAUGH I CAN'T BELIEVE WHAT I'M WRITING!!!

I need therapy. Now, please.



~~
Anyways, in happier news! I made some Cylon Rave icons for icedteainthebag. They're not brilliant, but I was bored.
  
 

The Badfic Game's going along fine. :P Relatively. My OFU story (apologies tomisscam for mutilating OFUM) got all screwed up on the site.

Now I need to go drown myself in Bleeprin for writing a slash fic between my PPC Agent Eledhwen and my PPC Scientist Lori.
(Sorry, Mrs. F.)

I mean, seriously?!?!

Discovering Love
Genre: Romance, Rating: R, Summary: Lori Starrett vowed to never love another. But what happens when she meets Eledhwen Elerossiel? R&R please. No flames.

 

( cut to spare your eyeballs )

*cough cough* Reasons why it’s badfic:

Eledhwen is not a lesbian. Lori is also not bisexual. Lori DID meet Bill. Lori fangirled Legolas, but they were never in a relationship. Lori is not the best scientist in HQ. There is way too much urple prose. Where is the fucking plot? Eledhwen is not one to fall in love/get a crush on someone so fast; she’s immortal for frak’s sake, she’s got plenty of time to do so. It took two years for the real Lori and Jennifer (writer of Eledhwen) to discover their (platonic or otherwise) love for each other, so there’s a total screwing with time here. Lori is not an emo kid; she is usually relatively cheerful and outgoing. Eledhwen’s elven grace would never let her collide with someone. What would Christianne and Bill Fallis say to this? Eledhwen’s style of speech is formal with occasional modern sayings (thanks to OFUM), not poetic archaic speech. Lori does not wear impractical clothes like long green dresses every day. She got recruited for being a zoology major, not a healer.

There will be more reasons… as this thing goes on.

So I'm also thinking of doing something so twisted, it'll make people glad that I normally don't write shit like this. It involves Eledhwen (the apparently Amazing Homosexual Elf :P) killing her partner because her partner, out of JELLUSY, kill Lori. And then the Flowers That Be end up deciding to let her go to the Galactica-verse and getting married to Laura Roslin before Bill. The idea makes me cringe, but yeah.

First of all, yes that icon shows me and Mrs. F.

I'm feeling depressed. STILL. Argh, I need fic!therapy. Any help?

At least I might have a Vienna Teng concert to look forward to and also a day with a friend from elementary school, Christine (aka Christianne)